Baldwin is a hulking wide receiver whose game I really like. He's also the Chiefs' de facto #1 receiver, for whatever that's worth, with Brady Quinnjuice throwing shot puts at him.
Jon's the one with the dickhead hat.
Clay Harbor -- $6 to Norris
other bids: $2 to Alan
What did they do on Magnum P.I. when Tom Selleck went down? They cancelled the fucking show. What do the Eagles do when Brent Celek goes down? They try some weird spin-off where T.C. and Higgins become a gay couple and get into adventures in the helicopter.
Fuck yeah!
Dumpster Diving...
Rod Streater, $4 to Ben -- Meet the new Denarius Moore. Younger... stronger... bigger... yet still shagging passes by that sausage-stuffed colostomy bag Carson Palmer. Also, there's no "a" in Streeter, asshole.
LaMichael James, $3 to Mark -- We always play at the possibility of one of these claims becoming an actual keeper-quality player. We say it could happen, but I don't think anyone ever actually believes it. Well, in this case, I actually believe it. Is it so difficult to imagine Frank Gore going down and the electric LaMichael James exploding to lead the 49ers to the Super Bowl?
Yadda, yadda, yadda, gotta spend to win. Here's a pic of Shiva. Love that girl.
dropped: Domenik Hixon / other bids: $7 to Norris, $4 to Derrick, $2 to Chad
Nice add for Russ, but the person I want to talk about first is Derrick. Doesn't it hurt when you [smartly] pick a guy up, he produces, but then he gets hurt and you drop him... and then he ends up coming back and being a hot FAAB claim? Russ spent nearly a QUARTER of his budget on Avery, for a three week rental in the hunt for ping pong balls in the conso tourney. I've made this statement before, but I'll make it again: The correct way to manage your budget is to bid big early, land guys who might explode for the whole season. Hoarding your money only leads you to the $24 Donnie Avery claim in week 14. We as a league need to fix our behavior on this. BIG BIDS, EARLY AND OFTEN!
Google image search for "you are doing it wrong" yields this.
Paul Posluszny -- $5 to Alan
dropped: Joel Dreessen or Titus Young (tuesday drops!) / other bids: none
Poz is good enough, I guess.
Montell Owens -- $5 to Norris
dropped: Anthony Dixon / other bids: $0 to Joe
Now we're just going through the motions.
Dumpster Diving...
Justin Forsett, $4 to Kendall -- This is the third time I've added him. Ben Tate, you are a pussy.
Tony Scheffler, $3 to Kendall -- No Titus Young, no Ryan Broyles... I've got a feeling we're going to see Scheff involved as a slot receiver in Detroit.
Marcedes Lewis, $0 to Joe -- Airport Cinnabon!
Mike Thomas, $0 to Joe -- This is an interesting add. I'll stack my Scheff up against your Mike Thomas... and we both lose.
The rest? Child please.
Remaining Budgets:
Achilles Heels -- $33
Jesus the Moose -- $31
Kick Azz Giants -- $30
Glitterfist Lasersnakes -- $26
Blackpool Penguins -- $23
The Champeens -- $12
Double-O Daddy -- $6
The Magic Stick -- $5
THUNDER BEAR -- $4
Barclay Street Bruisers -- $2
Juris United -- $2
Roo Tang Clan -- $0
Nth Degree -- $0
Pink Nightmare -- $0
Biggest Claims to Date:
Rashad Jennings, $47 to Nathan on 10/24
Knowshon Moreno, $41 to Paul on 11/28
Alex Green, $32 to Mark on 10/10
Kevin Ogletree, $26 to Kendall on 9/12
T.Y. Hilton, $26 to Chad on 11/7
Jalen Parmele, $24 to Alan on 11/21
Julian Edelman, $24 to Patrick on 11/21
Rashad Jennings, $24 to Chad on 11/28
Donnie Avery, $24 to Russ on 12/5
Greg Olsen, $21 to Kendall on 9/26
Chaz Schilens, $21 to Kirk on 10/3
Danario Alexander, $21 to Mark on 11/14
DeAngelo Williams, $20 to Rookie on 11/28
Andre Brown, $19 to Russ on 9/19
LaRod Stephens-Howling, $17 to Ben on 10/24
Daniel Thomas, $16 to Rookie on 9/26
Robert Meachem, $15 to Paul on 10/10
Chris Ivory, $15 to Alan on 11/7
Marcel Reece, $15 to Kendall on 11/7
Domenik Hixon, $14 to Nathan on 10/3
David Wilson, $14 to Derrick on 11/28
Jeremy Kerley, $13 to Derrick on 9/12
Daryl Richardson, $13 to Derrick on 9/19
Tashard Choice, $13 to Patrick on 9/26
Ramses Barden, $12 to Russ on 9/26
Brandon Bolden, $12 to Paul on 10/3
Montario Hardesty, $12 to Russ on 10/17
Ryan Broyles, $12 to Rookie on 10/24
DeAngelo Williams, $12 to Joe on 11/2
Chad Henne, $12 to Rookie on 11/21
Dexter McCluster, $11 to Nathan on 9/12
Brian Hartline, $11 to Rookie on 9/19
Sidney Rice, $11 to Joe on 9/21 (Friday FAAB Rebound!)
LaRod Stephens-Howling, $11 to Rookie on 10/10
Tim Jennings, $11 to Ben on 10/31
Emmanuel Sanders, $11 to Joe on 11/7
Danny Woodhead, $10 to Patrick on 10/10
That's it for this week. But as always, remember...
The regular season is crawling away in the rear view mirror. Thoughts of sugar plums dance in the heads of the six Cup contenders. The rest are striving valiantly for personal pride and ever important 2013 draft position. As we head into the post season, let's take one last look at the numbers from the CKL's eleventh regular season.
Its been an honor, gentlemen.
Week 13 All Play Table
Notes:
This was seriously close, but I believe this might be my first ever All Play regular season crown. Kendall's late season push nearly overcame my total points advantage.
Seven teams finished within 13 games (the maximum All Play wins you can earn in one week of CKL action) of the top spot. That is borderline unbelievable parity amoung the playoff field, plus Kirk.
Joe finished in no man's land, 13 games behind Ben but 17 clear of Derrick. Clearly a man on his own.
Everyone managed to break the 1,000 point barrier.
Norris takes the regular season high score award with his 148.8 explosion in Week 12.
Russell "wins" the CKL low for 2012, with a paltry 46.8 scored in Week 7.
The "I DIDN'T INHALE" award for lowest high goes to Mark's 106.3 in Week 10.
The "I ONLY SLEEP WITH 7s OR BETTER" award for highest low is Chad's 81.6, also from Week 10.
Mr. Explosion is Norris', no doubt thanks to his high output surge at the end of the season.
Alan is Mr. Reliable, although Mark, Chad and Kirk were all close by.
Luck Index
Notes:
It was never in doubt: Achilles Heels are the unluckiest team of 2012.
Paul and Patrick tied atop the luck index, although 1.5 isn't really that extreme.
Interestingly, if Average Wins determined the playoff teams, Kirk would be in and Ben would be out.
The Hotness
Notes:
Norris and Kendall are both white hot heading into the playoffs. Watch out for those two.
The six playoff teams occupy the six top spots in The Hotness. Pretty remarkable.
Joe edges Kirk for hottest non-playoff team.
I'd feel bad for Rookie if he wasn't the Rookie.
Jenny Von Oÿ
Notes:
The inaugural Jenna is in the books. While Ben certainly had aspirations for a playoff bye only a short while ago, its somehow appropriate that Ben is the first to bed Ms. Von Oÿ.
