(It's not like any of you dildos are nominating anything from FAABnalysis for POTY or anything, anyway. So fuck it, you deserve me mailing it in.)
Music...
Claims...
Lorenzo Taliaferro
Winning Bid: $29 to Norris
Dropped: Alec Ogletree / Miles Burris / Bernard Pollard -- TUESDAY DROPPED!
Losing Bid(s):
- $17 to Patrick
- $11 to Ben
- $10 to Kendall
- $8 to Derrick
- $7 to Nathan
- $6 to Paul
- $4 to Kirk
- $0 to Joe
What I read somewhere about the player: "Another week, another new featured back for the Ravens. This time, Baltimore may have found a keeper. Lorenzo Taliaferro rushed for 91 yards at Cleveland on Sunday, with a 1-yard score included. He's not a flashy runner, exactly, but it would definitely not be a pleasant experience attempting to tackle him. Taliaferro finds a gap, hits it hard, then punishes someone. Playing in relief of the injured Bernard Pierce, Taliaferro saw three more touches than Justin Forsett, out-gaining the vet 91 yards to 65. It's tough to imagine Baltimore would keep him pinned to the sideline when Pierce returns. But I don't run the Ravens."
FAABnalysis: Taliaferro is a 6-foot, 229-pound battering ram. His running style reminds me of Rudi Johnson, in that he has one gear and is not a dynamic part of the passing game. But he's a grinder, and it seems like the Ratbirds need to grind games out this season.
Gotta love the upside here. Great claim for Norris. I love it when more than half the league comes out to bid on a player.
Fun fact: did you know that in some circles, the surname Taliaferro is pronounced "Tolliver?"
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| Chanticleer! |
Saturday Auction: DeAngelo Williams
Winning Bid: $17 to Joe
Dropped: Robert Turbin
Losing Bid(s): n/a
FAABnalysis: He's Carolina's starting running back, and right now the only Carolina running back that's even remotely healthy. This was a great claim by Joe, despite some bidding against himself.
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| Betcha didn't know DeAngelo played his college ball at Memphis. Betcha didn't know that the winningest two year stretch in University of Memphis football history coincides with DeAngelo Williams' upperclassmen seasons at the school. |
Greg Jennings
Winning Bid: $15 to Chad
Dropped: Rod Streater
Losing Bid(s):
- $11 to Joe
- $8 to Ben
- $5 to Nathan (didn't you just drop him on Sunday?)
- $5 to Kendall
- $2 to Mark
FAABnalysis: At this point in his career, we know what Greg Jennings is -- a below-average go-to wide receiver for his real-life NFL team, and a benchwarmer in the CKL. But his 5-for-70 line working with Teddy Bridgewater on Sunday, coupled with week 4 BYE WEEK HELL means Jennings was a hot commodity this week. Good claim by Chad, but not the sort of move that cements a championship or anything like that.
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| Greg Jennings played his college ball at Western Michigan. |
Eddie Royal
Winning Bid: $11 to Chad
Dropped: Jarrett Boykin
Losing Bid(s): n/a
FAABnalysis: Blinded by Hokie homerism, Chad took an $11 stab at fool's gold. I'm proud of the 13 of the rest of us for staying on the sideline and letting Chad do this deed.
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| Once upon a time, Eddie Royal played for the Broncos and was worth a damn. |
Sunday Auction: Alfred Blue
Winning Bid: $10 to Kendall
Dropped: Dri Archer -- REDSHIRT BURNED!
Losing Bid(s):
- $3 to Mark
- $2 to Rookie
- $1 to Nathan
What I read somewhere about the player: "Last week we talked about Blue as a player who could put up strong numbers if Arian Foster went down. We didn’t think he would get his chance so soon. As predicted, Houston didn’t use a committee in Foster’s absence. Instead, Blue saw 13 of the 16 carries, gaining 78 yards. He didn’t see a ton of carries because the Texans fell behind early and had to throw but Blue showed some of the ability that made him a highly recruited running back at LSU. Foster is dealing with a hamstring injury and those can linger. He also has a lot of tread on his tires. Blue could end up playing a major fantasy role this season."
FAABnalysis: The good news for me is that I made a decisive move to obtain a player with some newfound value. The bad news for me is that the Arian Foster owner in our league does not seem interested in trade discussions of any sort. So fuck it.
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| Alfred Blue, LSU |
Dumpster Diving...
Brian Cushing, $8 to Mark -- Three other CKL coaches were on the top IDP claim of the week. Propers extended to Mark for landing this roided-up freak of nature.
Jelani Jenkins, $6 to Mark -- 35 tackles and 1.5 sacks through three games, and nine CKLers are involved in the IDP auction. Mark wins another one, and paired with Cushing, has a nice-looking rebuilt defense.
Kyle Fuller, $6 to Derrick -- Cornerbacks are too boom or bust for my taste, plus Virginia Tech. But JPA, Ben, Joe, and Rook joined Doc in the bidding here, so... nice claim?
Demario Davis, $4 to Russ -- He gets tackles and is involved in the blitz package. Looks like a solid IDP claim, but $4 is still a bit rich for a relative unknown.
Branden Oliver, $4 to Paul -- No shit on this... I noticed him during the preseason, thought he looked great. Got excited when I saw that Woodhead was hurt, knowing it was going to mean a shot for Oliver. I thought I could sneak him through the back door with a $0 claim, but Paul [smartly] put some weight behind his bid. I hope he works out for you, Paulie. Exciting little jitterbug, this dude. (In fact, I bet the Chargers organization is secretly happy about the Woodhead injury.)
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| Branden Oliver, Buffalo |
Coby Fleener, $3 to Russ -- He sucks, Russ! Dwayne Allen (and T.Y. Hilton and Reggie Wayne and Hakeem Nicks and Donte Moncrief and Ahmad Bradshaw) are going to dilute his number of targets! This is not going to work out!
Stevie Johnson, $3 to Ben -- I love Stevie Johnson, and I love that the Niners are deploying him exclusively from the slot. Interesting addition to Hey-zeus, here.
Jeremy Kerley, $3 to Joe -- Does anyone else remember Davone Bess? Will anyone remember Jeremy Kerley three years from now? We're in a golden era of slot machines, and Kerley is a really good one... sadly tied to a really crappy overall offense.
Eli Manning, $3 to Paul -- So Paul now officially knows what it feels like to lose a game of soggy biscuit. Tune in to watch Thursday night, as Paul eats the biscuit!
Matt Prater, $3 to Kendall -- Sometimes I just get too fucking smart for my own good.
Rolando McClain, $2 to Paul -- Wow, this was a genius IDP claim. Well done, Paulie.
Scott Chandler, $1 to Ben -- Shitballs, our league is way too fucking deep when this chode is a money claim.
Sio Moore, $1 to Paul -- Another beautiful forward-thinking move, Mr. Gilbert.
D'Qwell Jackson, $1 to Norris -- Maybe the best bang for the buck in this week's IDP claims (of which I skipped a few, sorry guys.)
I'm done with the bum signs. I'm also done with the "gotta spend to win" tagline. So instead, here's Garfunkel and Oates.
Love the college team pics, K.
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